I am not a big fan of the Pirates of the Caribbean movies. The first one was genuinely entertaining, introducing the world to a new kind of pirate with Captain Jack Sparrow (courtesy of Johnny Depp) and starting a franchise that became increasingly over-the-top and bloated. The second film was an absolute mess, and the third was only better because it actually had an ending. And perhaps worst of all, the sequels managed to turn the roguishly fun anti-hero Jack Sparrow into a complete d-bag. I know other folks still liked his character, but I found him to be unlikeable and annoying. In fact, by the end of the third movie, the only character I even remotely cared about was Orlando Bloom's Will.
So now I have finally seen the fourth movie. The first thing I noticed is that the producers seem to have realized that they went a bit too far with the earlier sequels and have reeled the franchise back in a bit. But were they successful in making a better movie? Did they manage to right the ship, so to speak?
Not really. Though they make a good effort.
On Stranger Tides brings us a new mystical location for everyone to pine over: the Fountain of Youth. Blackbeard (Ian McShane) wants to find it badly because he senses his death is fast approaching. He uses his daughter Angelika (Penelope Cruz) to enlist the one man who may know where the Fountain is - a former lover, none other than Jack Sparrow. But Blackbeard and Sparrow are not the only players in the game. The Spanish want to find the Fountain, too. And Sparrow's old nemesis, Captain Barbosa (a scenery-chewing Geoffrey Rush) is also on the hunt, though his ultimate target is a bit different. There is also a random missionary, Philip (Sam Claflin), who seems to be in the film for no other reason than to be a stud-muffin for the mermaids to fall in love with.
Mermaids, you say? Aye, there be mermaids. In order to find the Fountain of Youth, the pirates need to capture a mermaid, and that mermaid "fishing" scene is probably one of the best sequences of the film, starting off full of eerie atmosphere and genuine tension. It is a certainly a far more exciting scene than the ridiculous climax, which is a chaotic set piece where all of our moving parts finally come together in a way that makes no sense...
There are other parts of the film that I do like. Director Rob Marshall (Chicago) has a good eye for art direction and he also keeps the film moving along at a nice clip. The cast is pretty solid, though Ian McShane's Blackbeard and Johnny Depp's Jack Sparrow are the real stars of the show. In some ways, the reclamation of Jack Sparrow is the best part of the movie. They made him the loveable rogue that he was in the original, and that was great to see. He is just a helluva lot of fun.
And I do appreciate that they toned back from the massive special effects behemoth to an adventure that is a bit smaller in scale. But there are just too many problems with the film that kept me from liking it. The plot never really makes sense, plot threads are left dangling (so what happens to Philip at the end?!), and certain character moments don't make any sense.
I suppose most of my issues are pet peeves. The biggest problem with the movie isn't something specific. It's just that the movie is kind of blah. It's just kind of there. It's not terrible. For me, it was worth watching because of Depp, McShane, and the mermaids. But everything else is just kind of blah. You can skip it.
BEST LINE:
Blackbeard (to Philip): Oh, you now? This is a chance to the show the worth of your prayers. Pray he be delivered froommmm...evil?
MVP:
Ian McShane is the clear winner here. This is just a fun performance. McShane is smart. He knows that the best villains are not over the top, and his Blackbeard is generally low key. He is evil. He's a bad, bad man, and he knows it. He doesn't need to show it off. Some villains in movies seem so insecure in their villainy that it seems they are overcompensating with crazy, over-the-top acting (this was especially true in the 80s). But Blackbeard doesn't need to show off his villainy. He's so confidant that he seems almost bored by it. And I don't think the character was written that way. I think it was a choice that McShane made. And it is a really good one. McShane gets my MVP.
TRIVIA:
Penelope Cruz was pregnant during the production period. As filming continued, that baby bump started to become really difficult to hide. But luckily Penelope has a sister, Monica. The producers decided to be sneaky and use Penelope for all the closeups and Monica for all the wide shots. I actually didn't notice, and I went back and looked. They must really look a lot alike!
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