Saturday, February 11, 2017

Die Another Day


So now at last we come to the end of Pierce Brosnan's mixed tenure as James Bond.  Today's review is Die Another Day, or as I like to call it, "The Tale of Two Bonds."

"It was the best of Bonds, it was the worst of Bonds."

Yeah, let's just say this is a weird one.  Die Another Day is loathed by most people; many even consider among the worst of the franchise, if not THE worst of the franchise.  An emphasis on explosions, dodgy CGI and invisible cars were all symptoms of everything that was considered bad about the Brosnan era.  And half of the film really is that bad.

Unfortunately, it is the second half of the film, so people leave the movie with the bad taste in their mouths.  But the judgement on this film is not really fair, because the first half is actually not that bad. Actually it's pretty darn good.

And to be honest, Eon Productions needed Die Another Day to be good. Not only was the film the 20th in the franchise (which is quite a milestone), but 2002 was the 40th anniversary of Dr. No, the first film in the series, and the 50th anniversary of when Ian Fleming published the first novel.  The best way to celebrate such an achievement would be to go big and create one of the best films of the franchise.  Die Another Day even pays homage to all every single film that came before it - ranging from cute gadget cameos (Thunderball's jet pack) to Halle Berry's memorable recreation of Ursula Andress' first appearance in Dr. No. At one point, Bond even picks up a book called "A Field Guide to Birds of the West Indies."  Ian Fleming, an avid birdwatcher, quite enjoyed the book - so much so that he decided to borrow the author's name...that name was James Bond.

Even separate from the multiple anniversaries, there was a tremendous amount of pressure to make Die Another Day good.   The World is Not Enough was financially successful, but the criticism from both fans and critics was harsh and there were lessons to be learned.  There were also actors like Vin Diesel who declared the age of the well-tailored super spy were done.  It was a new generation and Bond wasn't awesome enough. He put his money where his mouth was by producing and starring in the extreme sports/super agent movie, xXx, which literally kills off a tuxedo-clad secret agent in its opening scene. xXx was a big hit, and I remember hearing rumblings that maybe Bond was no longer "cool enough."

So, yeah, I think the pressure was on to make Die Another Day the biggest and the best.

The movie gets started on a strong note and finds Bond going undercover as an arms dealer in North Korea.  He plans to assassinate a rogue military chief named Colonel Moon (Will Yun Lee) and his henchman Zao (Rick Yune), but somehow Zao is tipped off that the arms dealer is really a British agent and a fierce gun battle ensues. Immediately the action sensibilities of the director are felt, with Lee Tamahori (The Edge) delivering a knockout opening fight that is well-staged and exciting.  I felt like we were back in good hands again after the bland action of the previous film.  Bond gets his man, killing the colonel and wounding Zao, but is captured by the North Korean army.  And then something interesting happens.  Bond doesn't escape, nor is he rescued.  He is disavowed by MI6, thrown into a dark prison cell, and tortured with scorpions for over a year.

That was unexpected!  And already infinitely more interesting than anything in the previous film. Bond is eventually released in a prisoner exchange, and then goes off the grid to find out who betrayed him and avenge himself of Zao. The travelogue nature of the franchise takes him to Hong Kong (for a fantastic sequence with his Chinese intelligence counterparts), then to Cuba, where he meets American agent Jinx (Halle Berry), and then back to England, where the trail leads to billionaire philanthropist Gustav Graves (Toby Stephens) and his assistant Miranda Frost (Rosemund Pike).

There is a lot of exciting material in the first half of the Die Another Day.  It may not be perfect - Madonna's title song is atrocious and the scene where Bond and Jinx first meet is a terrible attempt at sexual flirtation that just comes across as creepy.  But all in all, we have some exciting material in the first half: Bond's anger over being disavowed, that Hong Kong sequence, Bond actually doing genuine spy stuff in Cuba, and an over-the-top but very entertaining sword fight. While watching the movie, a friend of mine who had never seen it, turned to me and said, "This is actually pretty good.  Why does everybody hate this movie?"

And then we hit Iceland.  And everything changes.

EVERYTHING.

Get ready for some spoilers below while I rant about the things I don't like about this movie. And it starts with that invisible car.  Look, I like the Bond gadgets.  There are some really cool ones out there, and it is an important part of the Bond formula.  But the invisible car brought us deep into futuristic sci fi territory and in a very stupid way.  And things get worse from there. 

Bond goes to a hotel made entirely of ice to see a demonstration of Gustav Grave's new satellite.  An ice hotel sounds cool, but it's really not.  He tries to sneak around to see what Graves is really up to, but needs to be careful because Miranda Frost is watching him closely.  Plus, Jinx is staying at the hotel on her own secret mission, though she basically just spends her time finding new ways of getting herself captured.  Bond eventually rescues her during a fight that involves over a dozen lasers in what was an attempt at honoring Goldfinger's laser sequence, but turns into an exercise in hyperactive stupidity.

It is almost like the first half and second half of the film were made by different directors, or as if the team didn't have faith in the first half of the movie and doubled down on what they thought was "cool" in the second half.  So the film is full of moments where the film speed is cranked up because that is what the "cool" movies were doing.  And let's have a whole lot of CGI!  Who cares if Bond is known for its awesome real-life stunts.  Kids today think CGI is "cool!"   I know, let's have Bond surf on a tsunami wave!!!!!  That will be amazingly "cool!"  For the record, even Pierce Brosnan thought surfing on the tsunami wave was ridiculous...

It's just bizarre because the first half of the film is so solid, while the second half is just a mess.  I didn't even get to the worse part where it is revealed that Gustav Graves is really the rogue North Korean soldier Colonel Moon!  That's right, in an extreme example of Hollywood whitewashing, he had an operation to literally make himself white.

The finale of the film includes a giant laser, an electric exo-skeleton battle suit, some of the worst one-liners of the series and a random appearance by Michael Madsen whose tiny role in this film amounts to sounding grumpy, barking orders and getting put in his place by Judi Dench.

Look, is the second half of the film all bad?  I guess there are small moments that work. I like Rosamund Pike, who I think is a solid Bond girl with a great accent and fun sword-fighting skills.  I just wish she were in a better movie.  Because by the time the credits roll, you really can feel it in the pit of your stomach, Die Another Day is just awful...and a terrible way for Brosnan to end his tenure as the character.

That said, at the time, I was still rooting for Die Another Day to beat the xXx in the U.S. box office.  Bond is the once and future king of the action film, and I didn't appreciate Vin Diesel's trash talking.  Die Another Day was a big hit, and made $160 million in the box office. XXX made $143 million.  So while that is not a beat down, I hope it at least showed Vin Diesel that Bond was still "cool" enough to win the box office war.

RANKINGS:

So where do I put Die Another Day?  What is fair?  It's too easy to say, "well, the first half is good and the second half is bad, so put it in the middle."  I can't do that because the second half is SO bad, it drags the whole movie down with it. It's an albatross that unfairly still weighs down people's opinion of Pierce Brosnan's tenure even to this day.  There is enough in this movie that I like that I just can't in good conscience put it with the worst of the worst, but I will put it right above that.  I think right under the stupid, but entertaining Diamonds are Forever is a good place for it...

1. Thunderball
2. From Russia with Love
3. Goldfinger
4. The Spy Who Loved Me
5. Goldeneye
6. The Living Daylights
7. Dr. No
8. Octopussy
9. For Your Eyes Only
10. Tomorrow Never Dies
11. Live and Let Die
12. License to Kill
13. Man with the Golden Gun
14. Diamonds are Forever
15. Die Another Day
16. The World is Not Enough
17. On Her Majesty's Secret Service
18. Moonraker
19. You Only Live Twice
20. A View to a Kill

MVP:

Of course, I am tempted to say Rosemund Pike, whose icy performance makes for a memorable Bond girl.  But I might be biased because I just happen to like Rosemund Pike, in general!  I wish I could say Halle Berry, who is a great actress, but this film goes out of its way to give her the worst dialogue imaginable.  No, in the end, the true MVP is still Pierce Brosnan in his final hurrah as the character.  He is excellent throughout the film and always professional - even during the most embarrassing moments.  People look back on the Brosnan years with disdain now.  They were all hits, but they were products of an over explosive and indulgent time period, and even though they were all successful at the time, fans generally roll their eyes at the movies now. It's not fair because I think that without a doubt Brosnan was the best Bond since Connery.  He was born for the role.  The movies just let him down.  With the exception of Goldeneye, they never lived up to the potential that he brought to the role.  And there is no better example of that than Die Another Day, a film with so much promise that utterly wastes an MVP performance by Brosnan.

BEST LINE:

It's all in the delivery...a fun one-liner delivered in the classic John Cleese style.

James Bond: You know, you're cleverer than you look.

Q: Still, better than looking cleverer than you are.


TRIVIA:

Following the success of Die Another Day, there were plans for a spinoff movie featuring Halle Berry's Jinx character.  Unfortunately, the studios pulled the plug after a few other female-led action films like Tomb Raider: Cradle of Life and Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle failed at the box office.  That's a shame.  While I would have preferred a spin-off with Michelle Yeoh's Wai Lin from Tomorrow Never Dies, I do think Barry could have carried the film.  Any problems with the character in this movie were not her fault, so I would have liked for her to have a second chance!