Outlander

Outlander

With a pretty strong internet fan following, Outlander has interested me for the last few years, but I never got around to seeing it. Admittedly, when I saw the preview, I thought it looked a bit hokey, like one of those silly movies you see on the SyFy Network. But no, the internet clamored, it isn't like that at all!! The special effects may not be great, because the budget was so small, but this is a well-acted and well-constructed bit of genre-bending fun. So influenced by these reviews, I finally sat down and excitedly dug in to watch some alien-Viking fun.

You know what? My initial gut feeling was right. Outlander is not good. It's not good at all. Other than some nifty ideas, this movie is a huge dud. Why is this getting so much love???

The idea, at least, is solid. Jim Caviezal (The Passion of the Christ) plays Kainan, an alien who crashes on Earth in the 8th Century, during the time of the Vikings. He didn't crash alone. A monster named the Moorwen was on the ship, as well. A creative-looking creature, the Moorwen is a large, slimy reptilian being that glows red or blue when it is getting ready to attack. The Moorwen is way too powerful for this primitive society, and now the Vikings must team up with Kainan to somehow find a way to hunt the creature down.

The idea is intriguing, a mix of 13th Warrior and Predator. And the cast is promising, including John Hurt (Alien) and Ron Perlman (Hellboy) as rival Viking leaders, Jack Huston (Broadwalk Empire) as a Viking prince and Sophia Myles (Tristan and Isolde) as a tough, sword-wielding princess.

But the cast is pretty much wasted. In fact, I don't even know why Ron Perlman took the part...

SPOILER ALERT! Why do you hire someone as cool as Perlman for such a waste of a role?!? He's in the movie for all of three minutes before his head goes pop. What was the point of casting him?! SPOILER OVER!

Back to the movie. I'm not going to complain about the special effects. They had no budget and did the best they could. They actually have a lot of fun with the glowing Moorwen and mask their limited resources fairly well. Kudos to them. But I can complain about a weak script full of unfulfilled ideas. I can complain about poorly staged action that is confusingly edited (that battle scene between the Viking armies makes no sense). I can complain about the disappointing acting from actors I generally like. I can complain that this movie is held in fairly high regard, which baffles me to no end. And I can definitely complain about losing two hours of my life that would have been better spent playing Borderlands with my buddy or staring at a wall doing nothing. It's all very confusing to me, and annoying. Avoid Outlander.

BEST LINE:

Kainan: "This thing has carved out a territory and you're in it!"

MVP:

Tough call with this cast. Caviezel alternates from being inspired to listless, depending on the scene and what he is asked to do. Hurt does add some prestige to the proceedings, but is mostly wasted. Perlman is pointless. And Sophia Myles probably puts in the best overall performance, but is weighted down by too many lady warrior cliches that just can't be overcome. That leaves me with Jack Huston, grandson of legendary director John Huston. Though just a side character, Jack Huston's Wulfric might actually be the only character who has a true narrative arc. Next in line to the Viking throne, he is equal parts dashing, arrogant, foolish and inspiring. At the film's start, he seems pegged as a bad guy, a stubborn rival to Kainan, and eventually a tasty meal to the Moorwen. But the character shifts at a certain point, as he learns more about the threat facing his village while also learning what it takes to be a leader. The movie unfortunately does not explore this theme, but I could see this sense of dawning comprehension in Huston's face. It's a nice performance and the one that lingers when the movie ends.

TRIVIA:

This is actually cool. Apparently, this is the first movie to actually use the ancient Norse language. This is the alien language that Kainan speaks in the beginning of the film, before his weird eyeball/downloadable translator thing teaches him how to speak English. Director Howard McCain hired an Icelandic professor to translate parts of the script and help the actors speak the language. Caviezal especially gets some props for speaking the language so fluently. But as we've seen in the past, he's good at that sort of thing!

Ten Commandments

Ten Commandments

What is the first movie you remember? For my generation, it was probably something like Star Wars, Willy Wonka, or one of the Disney cartoons. Is it weird that the first movie I remember is Ten Commandments? This probably explains my love of epics from a very early age, and also my tendency to be, err, over-dramatic from time to time. But seriously, my earliest cinematic memories are of this film and its epic grandeur. But I had not seen the film in at least 15 years, so when the Blu Ray arrived, I was a bit worried. Even in my memory, I could look back and see how cheesy the movie was in some places, how ridiculous, and over-the-top. I was a bit worried about confirming all that when I re-watched the movie, and potentially ruining a childhood memory.

Having now watched it again, I can confirm that The Ten Commandments is indeed cheesy, ridiculous, and over-the-top. And yet, in spite of that - or maybe because of it - The Ten Commandments works. It is actually deserving of both its reputations, as one of cinema's greatest epics, and also has one of the greatest cheesy films ever. It is rare that the film succeeds at both so brilliantly.

For those who don't know the story: In Ancient Egypt, omens alert the priests that a prophet is coming who would someday free the Hebrew slaves of Goshen. Taking no chances, Pharoah orders all the Jewish newborns killed. One mother rescues her own son by setting him in a basket on the Nile, hoping he will float to safety. Fate brings his basket to the palace, where he is picked up by Pharoah's daughter (Nina Foch, Spartacus), who is conveniently infertile and decides to raise the baby as her own, naming him Moses. Moses (played as an adult by Charlton Heston from Ben Hur) is brought up as an Egyptian prince and even becomes a rival to Pharoah's son, Rameses (Yul Brynner, The King and I). He is certainly favored by the current Pharoah (Sir Cedric Hardwicke, Suspicion) and his ward Nefertiri (Anne Baxter, All About Eve), who likes to over-dramatically swoon whenever Moses' name is mentioned.

Of course, Moses discovers his true heritage and this leads him on his path to becoming the spokesman of God, leading him to confront the Egyptians for his people's freedom and acting as the conduit for all sorts of miracles, including the awe-inspiring parting of the Red Sea.

Named as one of AFI's Top Ten Epics, The Ten Commandments certainly lives up to the word. Everything about this movie is Big, with a capital B. The sets are expansive, the costumes glorious, the music score by Elmer Bernstein is massive, and there are over 10,000 extras in the film. Yeah, you read that right. 10,000! Like all epics, the running time is a bit on the long side, as well, but I think it is a testament to DeMille's direction that the film never really feels slow. He keeps things moving at a lively pace, especially in the first half.

When talking about what makes The Ten Commandments entertaining, you also can't underestimate the cheese factor. The cheese is just as epic as the rest of the movie. The most hilarious example for me is in the physical acting. DeMille instructed his actors to not act naturally, but to be very theatrical. And I am assuming he ordered them all to pose constantly. It is incredible to watch almost every line reading in the film accompanied by arms being crossed, an arching of the back, or a foot dramatically lifting onto a step. This would make a wonderful drinking game!

Even the piety is The Ten Commandments is cheesy. Most religious epics bog down when religion enters the picture - those scenes always become overly talky and deadly serious - perhaps because filmmakers were worried about upsetting parents. A good example of this is The Robe, which moves along at a good pace until Richard Burton sneaks into the woods and watches a church gathering that seems to go for seventeen hours. Then St. Peter joins the group and proceeds to give a speech that I think is about as long as the Bible itself. In contrast, the piety of The Ten Commandments is more of the over-the-top variety - when Moses parts the Red Sea, an old man yells, "God opens the sea with a blast of his nostrils!"

In fairness, not all the religious stuff is silly. Some of it is indeed serious, but DeMille keeps these moments focused, character-driven, and not overly preachy - which I think is a big reason why The Ten Commandments is still watched by everyone, while films like The Robe and Quo Vadis are only seen by fans of the genre. There is also a more subtle religious thread in the film - I got the impression that both Moses and Rameses are atheists in the beginning. There seems to be a bit of cynicism when faith is mentioned and a lot of lines include something like, "if there is a God." Most intriguing and ironic to me is that later in the film, it is the strength of Moses' newfound faith that eventually pushes Rameses to start believing in his own gods. That's interesting material, and deeper than I would have expected.

Not to say The Ten Commandments doesn't have its problems. Despite the fact that all the memorable scenes are in the second half of the film, I feel this is when the movie begins to break down, narratively. The first half is terrific, focusing on Moses' years as an Egyptian prince. As I mentioned before, the pace is smooth and moves along briskly, leading all the way to when Moses finds the Burning Bush. 

Then we have intermission. And then I'm not sure what happens. I think DeMille loses interest in showing a story. Instead, he fills in narrative gaps with badly written narration, that he delivers himself in flowery and over-the-top language. DeMille may be a fine director, but he should not be narrating. The bouncing around certainly hurts the all important confrontations between Moses and Pharaoh - Brynner and Heston exchange their lines with powerful gusto, but the plot at this point leaves me with so many questions that I am distracted from their awesome fury. There are some basic common sense questions: Why do the Egyptians keep letting this guy just waltz into the palace? Aren't there guards? After continuously embarrassing Pharaoh in front of his court and his son, don't you think they would stop letting him in? The most egregious example of this is when Pharaoh enters part of his palace to perform a religious rite and Moses is already in there, waiting for him, posing melodramatically. How the heck did he get there?!

The problem is there is no narrative flow. We just bounce from iconic moment to iconic moment to iconic moment. While these scenes in of themselves work really well, it kills the storyline. And having DeMille bridging the gap by saying, "and then Moses went up the mountain and the people freaked out and decided to build a golden calf" doesn't work. That's not drama. That's a Sunday School lecture.

What salvages the second half is the Epicness. The costumes, the cast of thousands, and especially the committed performances by a great cast all see us through the spotty storytelling and carry us triumphantly to the end.

All in all, The Ten Commandments may not be perfect, but my childhood memories are not damaged in the least. I now notice all the flaws in the film, but I also recognize what makes it great. I would recommend you revisit it. You will laugh because of the cheese, but you'll also be impressed by the sheer Epicness of it all. It is definitely one of the classics.

BEST LINE:

At some point, said by almost everyone in the film: "So let it be written. So let it be done."

MVP:

I know it should be DeMille or Heston, but I can't help it - Yul Brynner is my MVP. Even as a kid, I was amazed by the performance. He is a superb villain - cocky, powerful, devious. Most importantly, he never gets blown off the screen by Heston's righteous fury, which can be overwhelming. Rameses vs. Moses needs to be a confrontation of titans, two stubborn and powerful men who will not yield. That is where the drama comes from, and if Rameses had been any weaker, the film would not have worked.

There are also other reasons why Brynner gets the win. He does the best job of handling the hammy lines, for one thing. Every actor has at least one line that they can't save despite their best efforts (the best example being Baxter's "Moses, Moses, you stubborn, splendid, adorable fool!"). Since he needs to be petty and conniving, Brynner is saddled with a dozen of these lines and each one comes out believable and awesome. It's only later that you notice that, "hey, wait a minute, that doesn't sound right!" Combine that with the fact that Brynner also gets many of the movie's best lines, plus an excellent character arc that Brynner nails, and some of the movie's best costumes, and you have a clear MVP.

I know everyone points to The King and I or The Magnificent Seven as Brynner's best work, but they should revisit his role here - he really is one of epic cinema's awesome bad guys.

OSCARS: Best Special Effects

OSCAR NOMINATIONS: Best Picture, Best Art Direction, Best Cinematography, Best Costume Design, Best Editing, Best Sound Recording.

TRIVIA:

Oh, where to begin? This movie is full of interesting trivia. I think a cool one might be that Audrey Hepburn almost played Nefertiri, but some studio exec thought she was too skinny for the part. I think this actually worked out for the best. I love Hepburn, but I think she probably would have played the role straight and Nefertiri needs to have a little crazy hamminess to her - something Baxter had a lot of fun with. I suppose the other problem would be that if Moses had rejected a Nefertiri played by the luminous Hepburn, the audience would have never forgiven him - making Moses the bad guy in his own movie!!! That's my two cents...

Crossfire Trail

Crossfire Trail

It might be time to give up in defeat. The Western is dead on movie screens. There was a time when dozens of Westerns came out every year, a time when every major actor had to have his turn at the genre. The Western was in many ways America's quintessential genre - no one else had them. It was our history, our West, our legends. For whatever reason, people stopped caring and Westerns stopped making money. Oh, there have been attempts over the years to get the genre moving again, but I can count the attempts on my two hands. In the last decade, I think only 3:10 to Yuma really did much business, though that is probably only because it starred Russell Crowe and a post-Batman Christian Bale.

Here's the strange thing. I do think there is still an audience for Westerns out there, despite what the studios think. And the network TNT apparently agreed as they pumped some real cash into making a series of highly acclaimed and well-received Westerns with Tom Selleck, Monte Walsh, Last Stand at Sabre River, and Crossfire Trail, which was my mom's favorite of the bunch. And I'll be honest - that is why I am reviewing Crossfire Trail first!

Based on a book by Louis L'amour, Crossfire Trail is the story of Rafe Covington (Tom Selleck) who promises a dying friend, Charles Rodney, that he will watch over his ranch and his wife back in Wyoming. As soon as he arrives at the ranch, it becomes clear that something hinky is going on. The ranch is abandoned, and everyone in town believes that Charles Rodney had died over a year earlier in a Sioux ambush. Seeing as how Charles died in Rafe's arms, on a boat off the coast of San Francisco, this all sounds mighty suspicious. After this intriguing initial setup, we then move over to a well-worn Western plot about the innocent widow (Virginia Madsen, Sideways), the ruthless gunslinger (Brad Johnson, Always) and the evil businessman (Mark Harmon, NCIS) who wants his hands on the valuable ranch.

Crossfire Trail proves that in capable hands - in this case, director Simon Wincer (Lonesome Dove) and star Selleck - even an oft-told story can still be entertaining when well executed. But sometimes it just gets to be a bit too much. Madsen is terrific as the widow Anne, but her budding romance with Rafe is not believable and only exists because that is what the plot demands. And the villains are just too cliche and one-sided, which is an special pity for Mark Harmon, a gifted actor who just can't save how his character is written. There are a few other minor complaints I have, including some cheesy moments involving other townspeople that just don't ring true - mostly characters again behaving not as they should, but in the way the plot demands. I also have to throw a special complaint to the makeup department because they saddled Wilford Brimley (Cocoon) with a huge wig that turns him into a rifle-firing combination of David Crosby and Santa Claus.

But that is getting the bad out of the way. There is a lot of good in the film. While the villains don't quite work, but Rafe's trio of allies, played by Brimley, Christian Kane (Leverage), and David O'Hara (Braveheart), are an entertaining bunch. And director Wincer has a good eye for the West and Crossfire Trail feels real and lived in. And he accomplishes the most important personal thing for me in Westerns - he gives me a good gunfight at the end!

And then there is Selleck. An underrated actor who unfortunately never hit the big time in feature films, Selleck might be one of the few performers who can pull off an old school Western tough guy today. He is very much acting in the mold of John Wayne, Clint Eastwood, Randolph Scott, and if he is not as iconic as those actors, he is still rides and shoots with the best of them. He looks like he was born in the saddle. The western genre lifestyle suits him.

There is something else I like about Rafe and the way Selleck plays him. They ignore one of those "cardinal rules" of film school. Film school drives home the lesson that major characters need to have a story arc, they need to learn something or else why would anyone want to watch the movie? I generally agree with that statement, but sometimes these character arcs can hurt a movie when they are forced upon a character who doesn't need change. Do you think Clint Eastwood's Man with No Name had to learn anything or have any sort of wishy-washy personal awakening? Of course not, and if Sergio Leone had included that gibberish, then he would have ruined his amazing westerns (such as The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly). Like the Man with No Name, Rafe Covington doesn't need to learn anything. He knows who he is and what he can do. More importantly, the audience knows who he is and what he can do. And we don't want to see him learn anything. We just want him to go to town and kick some butt.

Overall, Crossfire Fire is an entertaining, old fashioned Western. It breaks no new ground, but then again, it doesn't really want to. And with Selleck leading the way, it is pretty entertaining. And given the film's success on TV, it should make the big studios wonder if there is an audience for Westerns after all.

MVP:

Tom Selleck, clearly. He may not ride as tall as the giants (Wayne, Eastwood, etc.), but he might be the closest and most believable Western actor we have today. And he carries this film through its rough patches and makes me want to watch his other TNT westerns.

I want to give a quick special honorable to Barry Corbin who plays the town's corrupt sheriff - he has the probably the funniest moment in the entire movie, during the final shootout. Granted, this is more of a MVP moment, but I think its worth mentioning.

BEST LINE:

Rock Mullanny: A Frenchman, a German, and an Irishman all walk into a bar. Each of them order a bottle of whiskey with a fly in each one. The Frenchman says, "Mon dieu, I cannot drink this!" So he gives it back. The German picks out the fly and drinks the whiskey anyway. The Irishman grabs the fly by the throat and says, "Spit it out! Spit it out!!"

Sherlock Holmes (2009)

Sherlock Holmes

I had some doubts about Sherlock Holmes. The casting seemed solid, as did the design work, but the trailers left me a bit...confused. Were they turning Holmes into an action hero? Was director Guy Ritchie forcing Holmes into his usual British crime template (i.e. Ritchie's Snatch and Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels)? Was this another summer blockbuster experiment that was doomed for mediocrity?

Somewhat surprisingly, I have to say that I was pretty impressed with what this confusing team brought to the table. Overall, Sherlock Holmes is a bit hit-or-miss, but it hits far more often.

A new case is afoot. A recently executed villain named Lord Blackwater (Mark Strong) has been seen lurking about London and some very important people are turning up dead. The case is of particular interest to Sherlock Holmes (Robert Downey, Jr.) and Watson (Jude Law) because they were the duo that captured Blackwater to begin with. While toiling away on the case, Holmes also has to contend with an old lover/enemy/con artist Irene Adler (Rachel McAdams) who seems to be butting in on this case a bit too much.

I want to start the review by defending Sherlock Holmes against some unfair criticism. A lot of people have complained about changes that have been made to the characters to try and make them cooler for the new generation. I will admit, there is some of that going on, but not as much as people might think. Robert Downey Jr. is not the Sherlock Holmes we've come to know and love in popular culture, the rude and brilliant gentleman with the pipe and the deerstalker hat. But that image does not necessarily 100% correspond with the books, either. If I had to guess, I would say this image began with Basil Rathbone's portrayal in the 1930s, though I am not sure about that. But I do know that the cliche image is not from the original stories. Also, Holmes in the book may not be an action hero, but he sure knows how to fight. He practices martial arts and sometimes participates in matches. And Dr. Watson is not the cute, cuddly and slightly rotund sidekick who waddles around from case to case. On the contrary, he is a war hero and knows how to kick some butt.

But to be honest, accuracy shouldn't be that big of a deal anyway. Anyone expecting Hollywood to release a version that is 100% accurate to the books in slow-paced, Masterpiece Theatre-style production were deluding themselves. This is Hollywood Holmes, a roller coaster popcorn flick and for the most part, it really is an enjoyable ride. Director Guy Ritchie delivers an exciting film, with great technical prowess and top notch production design. Robert Downey, Jr. is terrific as Holmes, delivering a careful medley of wit, brilliance, cruelty and charisma. Jude Law is fantastic as Watson, a man who is attracted to these crazy cases despite his better judgement. The two have superb chemistry and the film does a fine job of juxtaposing Holmes' brilliant messiness with Watson's prim and proper military orderliness. The best moments of the film are easily when Holmes and Watson are riffing off each other; forget about the story. It's not really needed!

Especially since the story itself is a bit of a weakness. While Mark Strong is excellent as always, I found his master plan to be a bit hokey and the climax of the film definitely goes too far over the top. McAdams, meanwhile, is just an okay female lead. She handles the charm and the action well enough, but I had trouble believing her as the greatest con artist of all time. She needed a bit more edge.

I do also want to make a special mention of the score. I am generally tired of composer Hans Zimmer. His music and that of his collaborators has become cookie cutter and one size fits all, no matter what the genre. And I am tired of hearing The Rock and Crimson Tide when I am trying to watch a movie about gladiators or pirates. But what is most frustrating is that when Zimmer wants to be, he is not just good, he's REALLY good. And the biggest surprise about Sherlock Holmes is that the Zimmer I like came to play. This is an awkward, quirky, and lively score, and it certainly features his best main theme in a decade. Go Zimmer! This is the composer I want working more often.

Tangent over. All in all, Sherlock Holmes is a flawed but entertaining film. And it was a blockbuster film that for once deserved its massive box office because it delivered sharp and energetic entertainment. Despite its problems, I am excited to see where the franchise goes.

BEST LINE:

Mrs. Hudson: "Oh, he's killed the dog. Again."

MVP:

I can say with confidence that Jude Law is the best Watson I have ever seen. He blows other Watsons out of the water. But ultimately, this movie succeeds or fails on the back of Robert Downey, Jr. He once again finds a way to make an unappealing character (let's face it, Holmes is a bit of a tool) and makes him sympathetic and entertaining. If Downey's quirkiness had not worked, then the whole movie would have fallen apart. So ultimately, the decision is an easy one. The MVP must go to Robert Downey, Jr.

OSCAR NOMINATIONS: Best Art Direction, Best Original Score

TRIVIA:

When Robert Downey, Jr. was researching the role, he didn't just read the original stories. He also went straight to the 1980s series to study the late Jeremy Brett, generally considered the best Holmes in cinematic history.

Tangled

Tangled

Well, I have to admit, Tangled was a surprise. I was not expecting much; it looked like every other Disney princess tale, complete with songs and cute animal friends. I should have been rolling my eyes throughout this whole movie, but I actually found myself falling for Tangled's spell.

An adaptation of the fairy tale story of Rapunzel, Tangled is about a princess with magic hair who was kidnapped when she was a baby. Now a teenager, Rapunzel (Mandy Moore) lives her life under the dominating shadow of her evil 'mother' (i.e. kidnapper), played with devious relish by Donna Murphy.

Rapunzel sees a chance to escape when a thief named Flynn Ryder (Chuck's Zachary Levi) sneaks into the tower with an invaluable treasure he has stolen from the palace. Rapunzel knocks him out, hides the treasure, and makes a deal. Flynn will guide her in the outside world so she can see a lantern festival at the castle, and then she will return the treasure. Reluctantly, he agrees. Complications ensue, bad guys chase our heroes, young love blossoms, the princess is restored to her rightful place, blah blah blah. We've seen it all before and this story should be just as stale as my description. But something about the way Tangled goes about its storytelling is very impressive. Maybe its the influence of Pixar's Michael Lassiter over at Disney Animation, but Tangled seems fresh, lively and genuinely exciting.

First off, the voice casting is right on. Zachary Levi shows mountains of charm as Flynn Ryder, delivering a roguish wit that he never gets to display in Chuck. It must have been fun for him to break away from that typecasting and he approaches the role with gusto. Mandy Moore also does a great job, giving Rapunzel the perfect blend of determination and naivete, and never going too far in either direction. The animation is beautiful, the humor actually really works for both kids and adults, and the action is genuinely exciting.

If there is a weak link in Tangled, it is the songs. Alan Menkin's score is quite good, but I think Disney has to accept that the lofty days of the Disney songs are over. There has not been a good song since 'Reflections' in Mulan, and that was over a decade ago. Seriously, Disney, stop the songs! It just drags the movie down!

In general, Tangled also got me thinking about how we view Disney, in general. We hear Disney and we all roll our eyes. They have a formula, they are annoying, and we don't like them. But I think this is some sort of 'we hate them because they are successful' type of thing, and of course a reaction to their all-encompassing, over-the-top marketing/empire building. But people sometimes take their distaste with Disney's empire and project it onto their films, which isn't really fair because when I think of Disney's canon, they have made WAY more good movies than bad. Seriously, think about all those Disney films that were great - Snow White, Pinocchio, Dumbo, Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Robin Hood, Rescuers, Great Mouse Detective, Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin, Lion King, Mulan...are there bad movies, yes, of course. Brother Bear and Home on the Range made my eyeballs churn. But you gotta admit, there are a whole lot of classics in this canon. Tangled reminded me that when Disney is firing on all cylinders, they put out some of the best entertainment out there. I definitely suggest you check it out.

MVP: This one is actually easy for me. There are a lot of people after Flynn Ryder, including the evil thugs he betrayed and the palace guards he stole from. And also Maximus, the Guard Captain's horse. This horse is like the frikin' Terminator. He just will not stop. Even after the guard gives up, this horse just keeps on plowing ahead, like a stubborn bloodhound, relentless in his righteous fury! I've never quite seen an animal character like this in a Disney film. The animals are always too busy being cute and supportive. But not Maximus. He just keeps on coming, like the faceless posse in Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. And he won't stop until Flynn is caught, dead or alive.

SPOILER: What seals the deal is when Maximus has a sword fight with Flynn on the edge of a cliff. Yeah, you read that right right. The horse picks up a sword in his mouth and duels with Flynn. That's pretty awesome and probably the biggest laugh in the movie. SPOILER OVER.

Admittedly, the character softens in the last act of the film. It was inevitable and eventually he sort of returns to the roll of most supportive Disney critters. But for much of Tangled's screen time, Maximus' awesomeness dominates.

BEST LINE:

Hook Hand Thug: "Go. Live your dream."

Flynn: "I will."

Hook Hand Thug: "Your dream stinks. I was talking to her."

OSCAR NOMINATIONS: Best Song ("I See The Light") I guess the Academy liked the songs more than I did...

TRIVIA: After the box office disappointment of The Princess and the Frog, Disney decided to change the original title of this movie, which was simply Rapunzel. They figured a name like Tangled would attract more little boys and not just girls.

The Tourist

The Tourist

I was actually excited about The Tourist. The teaming of Angelina Jolie and Johnny Depp in a Hitchcockian light-hearted romp through Venice seemed appealing. Then the movie came out to middling and bored reviews, and my enthusiasm waned. But with one of my favorite cities in the world, Venice, being featured prominently, I knew it was just a matter of time before I saw it-for better or worse.

Alexander Pierce is a mysterious fugitive who has stolen a massive amount of money from a gangster and is also wanted by the British authorities (led by Paul Bettany from A Beautiful Mind and a former James Bond, Timothy Dalton) because he owes $744 million in back taxes to England. Pierce’s lover Elise (Angelina Jolie) is told to throw the hunters off his scent by picking a random shlub on the train to Venice and showering him with attention so that the police and the gangsters will suspect him, taking the heat off the real Alexander Pierce. The poor shlub just happens to be Frank (Johnny Depp), a boring math teacher who is visiting Italy. What is supposed to follow is a fun, sexy romp of mistaken identity, thrilling escapes from bad guys and heated chemistry between Elise and Frank.

The problem is, frankly, the movie is kind of boring. Angelina Jolie and Johnny Depp never quite work the screen like you want – the problem is the movie doesn’t know what it wants. They have two choices. 1) They can follow the storyline and have the hapless innocent, slightly dull, fish out of water being wooed by a women waaayyy out of his league – in this case, your chemistry should be forced because that is where you get the drama (and the humor). Or 2) the other option is to forget realism and go straight for Hollywood hotness. Who cares if he is playing a boring math teacher; this is Johnny Depp, one of the sexiest men in the world. And he is sharing the screen with one of the sexiest women in the world. Let them smolder! You can go either direction and be effective, but the problem with The Tourist is that they want it both ways and that just can’t work. The movie probably works best when they let Depp play bumbling. His terrified dash into the bathroom when he is first attacked by the Russian gangsters is a funny scene and provided the proper vibe that the whole movie should have had. Instead, the movie's tone wobbles all over the place, with some scenes played for broad laughs and others seemingly deadly serious. The movie is also burdened with a few twists that are in the movie just for the sake of having a twist. The big twist is clearly just there for effect and makes absolutely no sense when you consider the rest of the movie. It is one of the more poorly conceived twists I have seen in a long, long time.

It’s a pity because the movie could have been fun. It looks great, the supporting cast (which also includes Rufus Sewell from Dark City) is solid, and the Venice scenics are stunning to behold. The director is Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck, who directed the Oscar-winning The Lives of Others and the writers include the awesome scribes Christopher McQuarrie (The Usual Suspects) and Julian Fellowes (Godsford Park). So it really is just a shame the whole thing never quite works. The Tourist desperately wants to be To Catch a Thief, the Hitchcock masterpiece starring Cary Grant and Grace Kelly. Instead, it’s a missed opportunity and a dull one at that.

BEST LINE:

Inspector: "You wish to report a murder?"

Frank: “Attempted murder.”

Police: “That's not so serious.”

Frank: “Not when you downgrade from murder. But when you upgrade it from room service, it's quite serious.”

MVP:

I think I will go with the Director of Photography, the terrific John Seale (Oscar winner for The English Patient). If nothing else, The Tourist is a great looking movie, with terrific use of lighting and composition. When the action on screen wasn’t working for me, I could always switch my brain over and admire Seale's artistry at work. It doesn't hurt that he knows how to capture Venice at her alluring and mysterious best. I think I need to go be a tourist myself...

TRIVIA:

Tom Cruise was originally going to play Frank, but then dropped out. He was replaced by Sam Worthington, who also dropped out due to creative differences. Cruise and Worthington...chose wisely...

Whale Rider

Whale Rider

I will admit, I procrastinated with Whale Rider. I borrowed it from my parents a long, long time. I had heard it was good, but I kept putting it off, thinking, "I'm just not in the mood for that kind of film." Well, I finally forced myself to sit down and watch it, and I'm glad I did. If you have been procrastinating like me, waiting for the proper 'mood,' then stop! Just sit and watch it. You'll be glad you did.

In New Zealand, a young Maori girl named Paikea (Keisha Castle-Hughes from The Nativity Story) struggles with fulfilling her destiny. She comes from a long line of tribal leaders, but her twin brother, who would have been the next chief, died at birth. Only boys can be leaders and so Paikea's grandfather Koro (Rawiri Paratene from Fracture) starts testing the other boys in the village to see who is destined to be the next leader and possible savior of their dying culture.

The young boys act like, well, young boys and they are more interested in playing and kid stuff. Paikea, on the other hand, has already embraced Maori traditions, learning the songs and language, and even learning to fight with the traditional Maori weapon, the taiaha (a big no-no for girls). She lectures the other boys and even the adults when they seem to stray from the Maori traditions. Paikea, despite being vulnerable and wounded by Koro's harsh rejections, is a strong girl and it is clear she is destined to be someone great.

This is the movie's greatest strength, but in a way it is also the one weakness. Paikea is so obviously the next leader from the first moment she arrives on screen, that we are sort of just biding time and waiting for Koro to get with the program. You can only watch so many scenes of him being cruel to Paikea before you start yelling at the screen in frustration. I suppose in a way, Whale Rider is not even Paikea's story; it is really Koro's. This is the story of how a stubborn and devout man has to wake up and learn that sometimes the best way to preserve your traditions is to break them.

What I liked most about the film was that it opened a window into Maori culture, which I knew next to nothing about. When Koro is teaching the boys about Maori culture, he is also teaching us, the audience. I know this sounds like a whole lot of exposition, but it is actually all very fascinating.

I also very much admired the acting in the film. Though only twelve at the time, Keisha Castle-Hughes delivers a wonderful and layered performance and deserved the Oscar nomination - she is the youngest actor to ever be nominated. Paratene is also excellent, as is the rest of the cast, which includes Grant Roa (The Hothouse) as Uncle Rawiri and Cliff Curtis (The Fountain) as Paikea's father.

Based on the description and the cheesy DVD cover, you might think Whale Rider is not your thing. but trust me, it is. It's a really solid, well-made film and I think all of you would like it.

MVP: Not much of a doubt on this one. This is Keisha Castle-Hughes' movie. Not only does she bring an emotional complexity and maturity to the role, she is also inspirational, which I think is the most important and the most difficult thing to pull off for this film. You can understand why the people respect her opinion and how she actually inspires them to start shifting their lifestyle. It's not easy to play 'a chosen one' as a little kid. Just ask Jake Lloyd. But Castle-Hughes excels at this. She wins the award, easily.

BEST LINE: "Well, you wouldn't know it now, but before he got fat and ugly, your Uncle Rawiri was a bit of a the hotshot with the taiaha."

TRIVIA: Much of the film features Paikea doing traditional Maori things that women are not supposed to do. The film cast and crew performed special chants to ward off bad luck from Keisha Castle-Hughes who had to perform these customs.

OSCAR NOMINATIONS: Best Actress (Keisha Castle-Hughes). She lost to Charlize Theron for Monster.